Episode 4- Big Problem

4

Big Problem

The Biers’ research room was to be envied.  It was 40’ x 40’.  One wall was a series of windows overlooking the city.  The wall opposite the entrance was a large 5’ safe complete with combination lock that housed all the most important items.  The other two walls were lined with books of all shapes, sizes and origins.  Across the middle of the room where two long tables covered in maps writings and open books.

The place had the feel of a mad scientist’s lair.  Primarily because this is where Sam usually spent most of his time, when not partying that is, concocting theories on the location of the strange artifacts they hunted.

Karl exploded into the room, the door swinging open violently.  Inside he found the strange Middle-Eastern man and his large Mongolian accomplice.  The two intruders spun at the disturbance and the Middle-Eastern barked an order in the Mongolian’s native tongue and the large man charged Karl.

The Middle-Eastern stranger turned back to the safe and went to work on the number dial.

Karl knew both men would be unarmed for two reasons, one being that security downstairs is under strict orders to never let guns on the premises, and two, if they had guns they would have used them on Karl.

They obviously didn’t.

Karl’s muscles tensed in preparation for the inevitable fight.  The big Mongolian opened with a big hooking right hand.  Karl quickly dodged the tree trunk of an arm striking a hard response blow to the Mongolian’s ribs.  Karl wasted no time coming up and striking a second quick hard jab to the big man’s face.

The blows affected him, but not in a big way.  Karl wound up and threw a big left hand.

The Mongolian caught the punch in his own fist with a loud clapping noise.  The Mongolian front kicked Karl to the chest and sent him through the air and slamming into one of the book selves.  Books rained down on him while he gasped for air.  “That didn’t go as planned…”

The Mongolian was on him before Karl could catch his breath grabbing him by his throat with both hands and effortlessly lifting Karl off the ground in order to choke him to death.

At this point, awakened by the noise, Sam, still completely naked, stumbled into the room.

“What the hell is all of the racket?” Sam began before suddenly seeing the situation.  “Holy shit, Karl, is that the Mongolian from the train?!”

Although being choked, Karl still managed sarcasm.  “Good observation.  Help!”

 Sam lunged into action.  Naked action.  He cocked his hand back and gave a still right hand to the large Mongolian’s face.

The Mongolian didn’t notice.

Sam, however, screamed in pain as he held his hand.

“Sam!” Karl gurgled.

Sam turned around and began to machine gun punch at the big man’s ribs with no effect.

“ARE YOU EVEN TRYING?!” Karl managed.

“What do you want, the guy is a tank!” Sam responded.  “And I don’t have any pants on!”

“What do pants have to do with it?!” Karl screamed.

Sick of watching Sam fail, E who had been standing in the doorway, walked behind the large intruder, wound up and kicked the man in the groin.

 The Mongolian grunted and lost focus on Karl’s neck.  Karl dropped his hands on the big man’s elbows, breaking the hold he had on his neck.  Karl dropped to his knees and gasped for air.

The Mongolian turned and right crossed Sam, who stagger and went ass over head over one of the tables.  

As Sam crashed to the floor in a heap on the other side, the Mongolian turned his attention to the woman who had done him the injustice.  E.

E’s face turned to one of fear and regret as the giant lumbered toward her.  She instinctively moved backward, prepared to run.

Karl caught his breath and ran forward, leaping onto the giant’s back, trying to get his arms around the big man’s neck.  The Mongolian struggled and began to thrash as Karl hung on for dear life.

E was trying to figure out how to help Karl with the lumbering beast when she heard the loud click and turned her head toward the Middle-Eastern man, opening the large safe door.

E grabbed a pen off the table and against her better judgment, decided on a plan.

****

The thief had no interest n the fight behind him, so long as it gave the thief the time he required to get the safe open and get to his prize.

The fight had the desired length and effect, and as the last tumbler slid into place the thief popped open the safe and pulled the large heavy door open.

Inside was a stifling amount of junk, books and money.  None of that interested the thief. His eyes scanned for the item of his desire until finally he landed on the last piece of a very old puzzle he was determined to solve.

The man reached in slowly and grabbed the golden Ankh, finally putting his hands on the key to his life’s work.

A stiff object pushed against his back and his smile faded, he heard a woman’s voice, “Don’t move!  FBI!”

The Thief was worried for only a second till he used his honed powers of deduction understand he was in no real danger.  “I doubt that very much.  Are you not the woman from the hallway?”

E’s resolve faded.  “So?  Just because I was naked then doesn’t mean I don’t have a gun now.”

The thief smiled.  “I am impressed with your bluff, but not impressed enough to be afraid.  A gun to your back has a very different feeling than a fountain pen.”

“Don’t move, I swear…” E tried futilely to keep up the façade.

“Game over, my dear.” The thief said as he pulled a concussion grenade out of his pocket, pulled the pin and dropped it at E’s feet.

The thief swiftly moved for cover.

****

E watched as her idea failed in the worst way.  She wasn’t familiar with stuff having to do with war and killing, but she wasn’t stupid.  She knew a grenade when she saw it.

The explosive device dropped to her feet and she couldn’t move.  She was frozen there in the moment of her impending doom.  All she could do was make a sort of muffled sob.

That’s when she felt the hand…

****

Sam wasn’t a fighter.  In all respects he hated fighting.  It never solved anything and he only ever ended up with pain.

This time the pain was in his head.

He was starting to shake off the blow when he saw the bomb hit the floor.  Sam had only a couple of seconds to react, reaching over the table and grabbing E’s collar and in one motion, dragging her backward over the table to the floor, falling over her.

The grenade went off with a deafening boom and a blinding flash of light.  The force of the blast blew out the windows, assaulting the room with the warm morning air.  The smell off burnt sulfur filled the air.

It took a second for Sam to regain his awareness but as he came to, he watched the Middle-Eastern thief run across the room and leap out the window.

“Weird,” he muttered before looking down and seeing E below him blinking awkwardly.

Sam smiled.  “That’s the second time in twenty-four hours I have been naked on top of you.”

E frowned.  “Don’t remind me.”

Their conversation was cut short as a shadow was suddenly cast over them.  Sam and E looked up to see a very angry, very large Mongolian standing over them.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”  Sam muttered, deflated.

Karl was suddenly there and drove his foot into the back of the Mongolian’s knee.  The pop of its dislocation was audible.  The Mongolian giant lurched forward and howled in pain, dropping to a knee as his joint collapsed.  Karl stepped in behind him wasting no time with a brutal chop to the man’s collarbone with just enough force to fracture it but not kill.

Karl then grabbed the back of the giants head and drove it into and through the corner of one of the hard oak tables.

Dislocated knee, fractured collar bone and a major concussion put the giant down for the foreseeable future.

Karl watched to make sure the man stayed down.  He did, then turned to Sam and E, “Are you guys okay?”

E just nodded and Sam smirked.  “Can’t say I haven’t been better.”

Karl looked around the room.  “He got into the safe.”

“He jumped out the window,” Sam added.

Upon investigation, Karl noticed that the thief hadn’t merely jumped, he had attached himself to a rappelling rope and basically ran down the side of the building.

“He’s good.  You know him?” Karl asked as he investigated the rope.

Sam sauntered over to the open safe with no regard for his nudity.  “I do not, but he was Middle-Eastern, I would guess Egyptian, and we definitely know what he was after, he only took the Ankh.”

“I’m calling Carolyn.” Karl said.

Sam got a sour face.  “Do we have to?  I hate Carolyn.”

“Excuse me.”  E had been standing there watching the scene play out as if it were a normal occurrence for a giant Mongolian to attack them while a thief blew up their house and jumped out a window in order to steal from them.  “Does this happen often?”

The two brothers looked at her wide-eyed, then back at each other then back to E.

In unison they said.  “Kinda.”

TO BE CONTINUED…  

Episode 3-The Good Son

3

The Good Son

E clutched the sheet to her chest in a panic and rolled backward out of bed, instinctively moving in the opposite direction of the naked Sam.  She crashed to the floor in a heap with a stifled yelp, more out of surprise than pain.

Realizing she had made a noise she peeked back over the side of the bed, worried she had woken Sam.  Sam however, still slept face down and ass in the wind.  She could tell from the loud snoring.

She wrapped the sheet around herself and held it closed with her left hand while she gathered her scattered clothes with the other.  She did this in a hurried rush.  Instead of putting them on there, she had an irrational need to get out of the room.

She tip-toed from the room as quietly as possible, still unsure how she managed to open the door without dropping her clothes or the silk sheet that covered her naked body. Once into the hallway she found herself even more confused, how the hell did she get out?

A wave of self loathing hit her as she realized she would be certainly fired for this excursion.

She picked a direction and did her best to move as quietly as possible.  As she came to the end of the hallway she squeaked as two men came around the corner.  The one was a huge man who looked to be of Asian descent.  He was dressed in a suit that looked too small for him, and although not as tall he had the build of Michael Clark Duncan.

The other man was dressed in a black turtle neck sweater and black jeans.  He had dark Middle-Eastern complexion and his hair was combed and well kept.

The big one frowned at her and stared with a cold intent.  The Middle-Eastern man stepped in front.  “Excuse my friend, he did not mean to scare you.”

The man’s voice was silky smooth and full of charisma.  E just blushed and laughed in embarrassment. “No, no, he’s fine I’m just… trying to find the bathroom?”

The man’s lip curled in a sultry half smile.  “Of course.  It’s down the stairs and along the far wall in the main dance room.”

E nodded.  “Thank you,”

“Be careful, my dear,” He said as she edged past the two men.  “It is like a slumber party down there.  Mind your footing.”

She smiled again.  “Thank you, again.”

****

 The elevator dinged and the doors slid open, revealing the aftermath of a night of debauchery.  People lay everywhere, only half of them clothed.  Most had passed out where their bodies had given out against the endless supply of alcohol they had put into them.

Plastic cups and empty pint glasses decorated the main room, rolling across the floor and on the tables and couches.

Karl sighed as he beheld the scene.  He had only left Sam home alone for one night.

Slowly he found his way through the bodies and trash, only once stepping in a puddle of an unknown liquid.  He found his way to the bar, stepping behind it he found the coffee pot on and a note taped to the front.

Karl,

It wasn’t as bad as it looks.

I made sure Sam didn’t break any laws.

Set the coffee pot to have a fresh brew for you.

I know how much you like your coffee.

I know how much Sam will need it.

Courtney

Karl exhaled and pulled the pot free and began to pour himself some coffee as he turned back toward the room.

It was at that point he noticed the extremely beautiful woman making her way across the room with a sheet barely on her and a bundle of clothes.  She was so focused on moving through the crowd of drunks and party goers that she hadn’t noticed Karl behind the bar.

Karl grinned and placed the pot on the warmer before taking a drink.  The girl had gotten half way across the room when Karl decided to make his presence known.

“Rough night?” Karl asked.

The woman panicked and jerked in the direction of the voice.

When she turned she stepped on a sleeping man’s hand.  Hard.

He yowled in pain.

The woman screamed and stumbled, dropping the sheet as well as her clothes.  At the exact same time the two screams served to jar the room from its slumber.

This ended with the entire room staring at the blonde’s naked body.

The woman stood there for a second with everyone staring back.  Karl nodded as he looked her over and took another drink of his coffee.

The woman saw Karl behind the bar and held her tongue, she looked like she was about to cry.

“Best party ever.” One of the onlookers said.

The woman frowned and looked at Karl.  “May I use your bathroom?”

Karl had to grin.  “Sure, right over there.”

The woman followed Karl’s finger and nodded.  “Alright, thank you.”

She then strode across the floor and into the bathroom before slamming the door.

 Karl chuckled.  “Maybe I’m not going to hate this morning, after all.”

He then looked back to the onlookers.  “Party’s over.  Thanks for coming.  Ten on the elevator at a time.”

****

The last of the guests piled onto the elevator and the doors slid shut.  Karl smiled in the absence, finally having his place to himself.

He picked up the woman’s clothes and walked to the bathroom door knocking twice.  “They’re all gone, I have your clothes.”

There was a moment of silence then the door cracked open and her slender hand reached out to grab the outfit and pull it back into the bathroom.

After she shut the door again, Karl heard her voice through the door.  “Thank you.  I’m sorry about… earlier.”

Karl chuckled to himself.  “Nothing to apologize for, you made my day.”

There was a silence and Karl could hear her get dressed through the door.  “What’s your name, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“My name is Ethel Marion.  Most people call me E.”  She said.

Karl was confused, searching for where he had heard that name before.  It came to him, “Wait, you’re the new translator?”

“Ha!” She laughed and opened the door.  “After last night I will be lucky if I can still go back to my firm let alone have a job.  I have never been so unprofessional, and I’m sorry to waste your time.”

“Sam has that effect.”  Karl said with a shrug.  “Are you quitting?”

“No, you are firing me.” E said with a frown.

Karl was a taken aback.  “I am?”

“Aren’t you?” E asked, now confused herself.

Karl shook his head.  “No, not yet anyway.  We haven’t even had our interview yet.”

“But I was naked.  I woke up next your brother.  Why would you want to interview me?”  E was shocked.

Karl shrugged.  “You slept with Sam?  Points against.  Let’s hear your credentials.”

E pulled herself together but she was still flustered.  “I speak eight languages, they are the most common”

Karl looked surprised then turned to walk back toward the bar.  “Eight is impressive. Arabic?”

She nodded.  “Yes, it’s a little rusty but I can speak it.  I also know Russian, Spanish, Mandarin and Japanese in addition to some others.”

Karl picked up the coffee and took a drink.  “Smart and beautiful,”

She blushed.  “I suppose, you have already see me at my worst.”

Karl smiled at her.  “I can assure you it wasn’t your worst.”

Karl was an average height man, standing around six foot, with crew cut hair and a round face.  He was the most casually dressed business owner she had ever met, wearing faded blue jeans and a plain white tee shirt.  He was fit and built, with tone muscles that gave the impression that he worked out often.

E couldn’t help but feel attracted to him.  He was the opposite of his brother.  He stood tall and confident with a stone, hard cowboy feel to him.  It helped that he was cut.

“Rule one,” Karl said.  “You can’t sleep with Sam if you’re going to work for us.”

“Well, I kind of already-” She began to explain but Karl cut her off with a look of disgust.

“Yes, yes, that was your first slip.  Let’s make it your last.  I mean it.  Sam is trouble, stay away.” Karl said.

E Nodded.  “Alright.”

“Good,” Karl said.  “You’re going to have to stay here.  Will this be a problem?”

E Shook her head.  Most high end translator jobs required this, so she lived on a week to week basis apartment and packed light.  “No, of course not, will you need me to help with your meeting upstairs?”

Karl looked confused.  “Meeting upstairs?”

E nodded still pushing her hair around to try and make herself presentable.  “The Middle-Eastern and Asian men upstairs.”

Karl’s eyes narrowed.  “Asian?  Was he big?”

E curled her lip.  “Big is an understatement.”

Karl dropped the coffee and booked it for the stairs.  “Shit!”

E was confused.  “What’s wrong?”

“The Asian guy isn’t just Asian.  He’s Mongolian!” Karl yelled back.

TO BE CONTINUED…

Episode 2-Sam I Am

2

Sam I Am

E was lead through the main Bier brewery and home office in New York, New York.

This was strange, to say the least, because she had been told to meet them at their home at 2:30 PM to discuss her assignment and duties.

She had put the address given to her into her GPS, and it brought her here.  Now a very large black security guard led her through the main brewery.

“Excuse me, are you sure I’m in the right place?” E asked the large man.

The large machinery made it hard to talk, “What?”

“Are you sure I’m in the right place?  I was supposed to meet them at their home, sir.” E yelled back to him to be heard.

“Curtis.” The large man said.

“What?” E asked, confused as to how that would answer her question.

“That’s my name.” The big man said and turned his head backward revealing a big toothy grin.  “And yeah, you in the right place.”

At the other end of the brewery, Curtis stopped at a strangely located elevator in the middle of nowhere.  It dinged and the doors opened.  E just stared in disbelief.

Curtis chuckled to himself at her reaction and motioned for her to get on.

“You have got to be kidding me.” E said looking at Curtis.

“No,” Curtis said.  “But don’t it seem like I should be?”

With that, Curtis walked back toward the way he had come.  E took a deep breath and got on the elevator.

The elevator only had one button.

E shook her head.  “Who do these guys think they are; Batman and Robin?”

She pressed the button and the elevator lurched into motion taking her up.

****

The elevator stopped and the music was already deafening.

The doors opened into a huge, high-ceilinged living center.  There was a huge bar on the other side of the giant room and literally hundreds of people in between.  Music shook the place, some high end, techno/rap/rock garbage.

The place was like a dance club.

E looked at her watch again to make sure that, yes, it was indeed 2:30 in the afternoon.

It was.

She took a deep breath and considered pressing the elevator’s one button and walking right out the way she came in.  Instead, she decided to press on.

Moving through the insane cloud of dancing twenty something’s she moved toward the bar.  Hopefully the bartender would know where to find Sam or Karl.  For what seemed like forever, she swam through the crowd until she reached the bar on the other side.

Crashing onto the bar, briefcase in hand, now disheveled from the dance party assault, she exhaled and flagged down a bartender.

“What you drinking, hun?” The mildly attractive female bartender asked.

E frowned.  “It’s 2:30 in the afternoon, do you realize that?”

The bartender just chuckled.  “It’s always at least five at Sam’s place babe, so what are you drinking?”

E shook her head.  “I’m not drinking anything.  I am supposed to be meeting Sam and Karl Bier.  I have an appointment.”

The bartender shrugged.  “Well, Karl doesn’t usually show to these parties till later.  And Sam is around here somewhere.  Now if you’re not getting anything, you need to make room for paying customers.”

“She will have a glass of champagne, Courtney.” A male voice suddenly made E’s non-existent order for her.

The bartender, known as Courtney, smiled and nodded walking off to prepare the order.

“Now hold on, I said I’m not ordering!”  E called after the bartender, but got no response.

She was furious at this entire ridiculous scenario.  She turned angrily to see that standing next to her in a blue pin stripe suit and a loose black tie, was none other than Sam Bier.

“Oh, I’m sorry did I call that wrong?” Sam asked as he looked her over again.  “It’s just you’re wearing that form fitting business suit, but you have that big coat over it, which screams to me that you know you’re hot but not sloppy.  Honesty, I would have figured you for a wine drinker but we don’t have any of that here.”

E pointed at him.  “You’re Sam Bier.”

He grinned.  “Well, if you say so.”

E frowned.  “We had an appointment today.”

Sam raised an eyebrow in confusion.  “We did?”

E nodded as her drink was put in front of her and another pint of beer in a long pilsner was placed in front of Sam.

Sam suddenly smiled and placed one hand on her hip.  “Well then, what kind of appointment was it?”

E slapped the top of his hand and he recoiled like a pouting child.  “It certainly wasn’t that kind!”

Sam stopped pouting.  “What was it then?  Do I owe you money?”

“I’m the new translator!” E screamed.  “And this has got to be the most unprofessional meeting I have been to.  I have never been more insulted in my life.  It is 2:30 in the afternoon, and you literally have a dance club in your house, which is above your brewery!  This is beyond ridiculous; you should be ashamed of yourself.  How does your business stay afloat like this?!  How do you do business in these kind of conditions?!”

Sam shrugged.  “You’d be amazed how many of the partners love this kind of thing.”

E stared at him.  “Are you kidding me?!”

She screamed this last part and when she did it was timed in between songs.  Everyone in the place stopped and looked at her and she suddenly felt very embarrassed.

Sam raised both hands.  “Alright, obviously we got off to the wrong foot.”

Sam snapped his fingers and gestured and suddenly somebody took E’s coat and another took her briefcase.  “So how about you take off the coat and relax?”

Sam stepped in very close, making perfect eye contact and E couldn’t help but be attracted.  She wasn’t sure if it was the over the top situation or how good Sam looked, but she was caught by his charm.

“Now,” Sam said.  “Why don’t you have a drink of the champagne?”

Everyone in the club was still watching them and E had never felt stranger in her life. What was she going to do, refuse?

She drank the champagne and it was good.  Damn good.

She turned back to the crowd.  “MMM, good”

The entire crowd exploded with celebration, the music kicked on and they were again dancing.

“Aww look, you made them so happy,” Sam jested.

She thought, ‘what the hell’ and finished the glass.  “Where’s your brother?”

Sam shrugged.  “Probably off trying to break the world chin up record or something.”

The bartender put another glass in front of E.  “Well we should go somewhere and talk business.”

“Or,” Sam countered, “We could stay here and talk about the genetics that gave you those legs.”

E blushed and took another drink.  “You need to stop hitting on me.”

Sam smiled.  “You need to realize something…”

“What’s that?” She asked, taking another drink.

“I had you the minute I ordered for you.” Sam said with a confident grin.

“Is that right?” She asked shaking her head.

“Give it time.”

****

E’s eyes slowly opened.

Her eyelids felt heavy and weighed down by some invisible force.  At first all she could think about was how much her head hurt.

She realized she was not in her own bed and began to panic.  Her memory from the night before was foggy and slow to return.  As any drinker did at least once in their lives, she tried to retrace her steps leading throughout the night.

She remembered the ridiculous penthouse and the dance party in the middle of the afternoon.  She remembered the champagne, and then….

“Oh no.”  She whispered to herself and turned towards the other side of the bed.  Lying there, face down, but naked and ass in the air, snoring rather loudly was a man.

Not just any man.  It was Sam Bier.

E shook her head.  “Mother fucker.”

To Be Continued…